It's About Freakin' Time That I Freakin' Updated!

Disclaimer: This entry was started on Wednesday but I wasn't able to finish it until today! So yes! I am in Vancouver with my yonce right now! :) 


Whew. Quite possibly one of the most stressful three weeks ever. Eh. VURR.

Exams are FINALLY done for now and the day after tomorrow I am traveling cross country to my patient and loving life partner for some hardcore R&R. And quite possibly (shield your eyes children) some much- needed-snuggling and spooning. Unfortunately, although my immune system has courageously been warding off the pitfalls of chronic stress and lack of sleep, it is slowly losing ground. I feel prettttyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy damn sickly. I'm gonna pop some vitamin C, brew myself some chamomile tea, and tuck myself into bed tonight hopefully no later than midnight.

There's a ton to update on so I'll have to break up the weekend saga into separate posts. Here's the update from my trip to Kleinfelds and NY:

SATURDAY: NYC
The long-awaited day trip to the city was so much fun and everything I needed since having enrolled in this semester from hell. Woke up early to pick up the Delaware crew (I conveniently tow a shaggin'-wagon that holds up to seven people) and headed to New Jersey to meet up with another friend. The drive was pretty uneventful save for a few frustrating moments of Police-induced traffic but we made it to Journal Square safe and sound. We grabbed a quick coffee and snack and made our way to the city and Kleinfeld's for my 11:15am appointment. The six of us were joined by a seventh and we all giggled and screamed like little girls when we saw the sign outside the bridal boutique. Of course I had to take a picture being the tourist that I am.

Kleinfelds!

Once inside, more squeals could be heard as everyone was oooohing and ahhhhhing over all the dresses that were on display. The place was bigger than I thought and my excitement only escaladed when I spotted a video crew filming a patron in the main show room. THIS COULD BE MY BIG BREAK! BYE-BYE NURSING SCHOOL! Our consultant Rita took us back to a dressing room which barely contained all of us plus felt like a freakin' sauna due to the glaring spotlights overhead. I gave Rita the breakdown of what I was looking for: bling, big, tulle, train, ballgown, sweetheart neckline, glam, rockstar, royal, majestic, and all under $5000 (This isn't really my dress budget, but I figured I could have some fun while I was there). Rita said "I got you honey" in her thick middle eastern voice and came back with THE. DRESS. OF. MY. DREAMS. It was a Pnina and was MASSIVE. I had seen it online and I had LOVED the photos of the dress but I had told myself before getting to Kleinfelds that I wouldn't try it on because I also knew the approximate price of the dress. It starts at a WHOPPING $10,000. That conniving little consultant! She grabbed a dress DOUBLE the price range I gave her! Of course by then it was too late: I was already stripping down. The functions of logic and reasoning that were supposed to kick in were dumbed down by all the magnificent sparkles and radiance of the dress. My girlfriends thought the dress was pretty major. Rita laced me into that dress and marched me out to the main floor to where all the big mirrors were and I was in love (Oh yes, and I intentionally walked in front of the rolling cameras and blocked their shot of the bride they were filming. Look for me! ). It was everything I wanted in a dress. However when Rita told the girls the price of the dress, they knew that I shouldn't/couldn't REALLY fall in love with the dress. And I knew this. However, logic and reasoning suddenly began to work again and I began contemplating selling my car, my furniture, my bed, and even a few of my ovum. I could totally sell my unfertilized eggs! It wasn't like I was using them! That could bring me an easy $5000! This could totally work! My loving and trusty galpals slowly brought me back to reality and gingerly coached me out of that cursed dress and asked Rita to bring out the next dress so I could begin the grieving process.

Luvlayyyy.

But could you believe it?? That horrible wench Rita brought me out ANOTHER Pnina! A TULLE Pnina! Of course the cycle of destruction continued and I once again loved the dress for all its sparkles and tulle and corset body. I didn't want to ask but I did anyways and Rita told me that this one started at $8,000. Oh, the joys and heartaches of gown shopping. The girls once again ushered me out of the dress and in order to counter the depression that had begun to cloud my face, they grabbed other dresses that caught their eye on the sale rack and other "non-Pnina" sections. But I think I was done for the day and Rita knew this as well. I was going to try on a couple more since I had dragged my girls there but what I really wanted to do was leave and get my city on. I knew I wasn't going to end up buying anything from Kleinfelds and I'm sure Rita saw it on my face and that's why she went straight for the jugular. I did ask to try on an Eve of Milady but it wasn't the same. I tried on another dress that was pretty and sweet but wasn't me and I think I tried on another one that was totally forgettable. I announced that I was tired of getting naked, I was hot and sweaty, and how 'bout we get our drink on and the girls readily agreed. You win this time Kleinfeld you big ol' heartbreaker you. But honestly, I don't regret going because I thought it was a fabulous experience. It's quite ritzy and glamarous in the boutique and I definitely recommend it for any diva bride. I even recommend it for girls just wanting to be pampered! Kleinfeld it up ladies! :)

At Oralfix

Okay, next stop was Limelight which was this really hip market inside of what used to be a massive church and my good friend Julie joined us at the bar inside. All of the original external structures were left intact, including the beautiful stained glass windows. We grabbed a quick lunch and the girls all had a drink and then we headed to the Museum of Sex which was so much fun! The tour included a history of pornography, homo-erotic material, fetishes, animated porn, sex toys, a history of contraceptives, and modern art relating to sex in general. My favorite segment probably had to do with Pony Play. Yes, look it up. After the tour, the girls had another round of drinks at the bar downstairs called Oralfix. We then took a long trek around the city to the awesome and amazing Chelsea Market and browsed through the shops and stores inside. We did an early dinner at Park restaurant which was soooo cool. The venue looks like we're outside eating in a park but we're really inside a rennovated garage. Too trippy. The food was fine, service was horrendous and my BILL WAS A MASSIVE SCAM. The restaurant is decently priced and the girls were getting good portions with their pizzas and sandwiches. I ordered a pasta dish that I thought looked skimp but didn't put up a fuss until I got my $20 bill. There were two portion options on the menu: a $10 portion and a $20 portion. If the portion that was served to me was $20, then I pretty much paid a $1 per penne noodle.

Park toasting.

Pasta insufficiency. Not altered in any way. Photo taken immediately after it was placed in front of me.

Happy Bridezilla.

Of course I put up a fight, that was met with three levels of resistance, which I countered with threats, announced that I had photographic evidence and that I was going to BLOG about Park restaurant being the biggest scam in the city. The head manager came out, requested to see the photo then promptly voided and replaced my original check for the more suitable $10 bill. I was placated and was ready to get out of there and get dessert. See? It totally pays to take pictures of your meals! :)

Post dinner we went back to Chelsea Market for desserts. I got the best hot chocolate in town and the other girls got cupcakes and wine for the ride back home. The ride home was filled with side-splitting laughter that barely left me capable of driving. But we made it back in one piece. Believe it or not, Anneliese and I partook in birthday party debauchery when we got back and needless to say, when I finally got home that night, I pretty much just passed out with all my clothes on.

Best Freakin' Day Ever.

More updates to come!